Yesterday, as I was exiting the airport I started to hum a song in my head and then I started to sing the words in my head. I was waiting to get to my car and find the song on my phone so I can play it. And I did that. I played the song. This happens to me a lot. I think of a song and then I keep playing it over many many days. My teacher says this also can be an addiction, this song is stirring up something in me and I am enjoying this feeling, so I want to keep listening to the same song, to relive the same emotion over and over again. How fascinating, right! I discover so many simple things about life through his teachings. There isn’t a wrong or right way here, but the point is to become aware of why you’re doing it. Do it, if it gives you happiness but just be aware.

So, coming back to the song, the song basically said you and me, me and you, let’s enjoy this silent night. Is it possible for you to hear me and me to hear you without us saying a word? Can we both talk to each other without saying anything to each other? And so the song triggered something in me. Maybe because this whole romantic kinda love these days is a big question mark in my life. And so I asked myself, can I really talk to someone across a room without me saying a word and they saying a word. Can we sit in this silence? Enjoy the silence but also talk to each other like literally exchange some thoughts without any sounds coming out of our mouth. Beautiful right? I would love to be able to do it sometimes.

I have realised that with some people silence is golden. You can sit with them in silence for a long time and the silence doesn’t get to you or you don’t feel awkward but with some people the silence bothers you. A few people, in fact cannot sit silent. They have to say something to you. I was that person actually. I always wanted to fill in the silence at events and I would also be one of the first to notice that everyone is silent.

With my teacher Nithya, being silent comes naturally to me. It’s only been over zoom for me but I enjoy the silence, I love it when he goes silent between his words. Just sometimes, I wonder if I have got logged out because his silence can go on for 10,15, 20 minutes but I love it. I love that silence. These days I love silence more than talking. I talk but then I quickly go back to being silent once I have finished meeting someone and I am back in my car. I don’t make any random conversations. I don’t randomly call people. If my daughter is with me, I answer her questions but I am also teaching her that it’s fine to be silent sometimes. I tell her to ask me questions tomorrow or we play a game around who can be silent for longer. She’s slowly learning and I am so proud of that.

The magic lies in the silence. The love lies in the silence. The beauty lies in the silence. Most people don’t get this. I didn’t get it for the longest time but today I am here and I know for a fact that I am a much calmer person to be around. And it’s only the beginning for me. It is the beginning of this beautiful long journey of discovering myself in this silence.

But the next time you’re with a loved one, do this. Sit in silence and as you think of them lovingly, pass on those loving vibes to them but sit in silence for a few minutes and then a bit longer and see how you feel. Check how you feel? Do you feel this urge to say something or Do you both enjoy the silence?

Lots of Love & Silence,

Miss Light